How didn't I see it from the start?

April 8th, 2008.
Waiting until 12:01 to post this much needed breath of factual air was probably the most excrutiating experience of my life. It needed to be done before more people were sucked into the lie.

“I will not provide a link to this offense, as I fear he may attack you with more painstakingly handcrafted bundles of trickery.” – Myself

It was as though the gods had leaned down from the heavens and bestowed upon me a wisdom of what was to come. For today the aforementioned prophecy has not only come true, but has materialized in such a way that the earth would rumble as the mass of his dark army marched forward, chanting their false battle cries loud enough that even the deaf couldn’t escape their ill-masked temper tantrum.

For those of you who are lost, there is some pre-requisite reading.
http://torbox.vox.com/library/post/lies-lies-lies.html

http://oldmanlever.vox.com/library/post/the-truth-the-whole-truth-and-nothing-but-the-truth.html

OldManLever has seen the challenge I pose to his plans, and knows that if he does not act accordingly I will have a swift victory on my hands, written out in his liquefied loss. He decided that it would be in his best interests, as well as his employers(we’ll get into that in a bit), to try to pin me as the lie spinning spider. But I know that the citizens of the world are smarter than that, and luckily for me they have already been tipped off to his manipulative ways. Fear not friends, his meek attempts to demoralize me have only fueled my desire to end this ungodly injustice once and for all.

OldManLever has secured a weapon which most thought beyond his grasps, a weapon which has the potential to bring entire civilizations to their knees (where did NTLDR go?!?). Just as Sauron was able to corrupt and harness the power of the wise and mighty wizard Saurumon to aid him in his war against middle earth, Dennis has added the wise and mighty Chris Mogensen to his arsenal. This is a man I have an undying respect for, a man whose unwavering wisdom and ability to pass his knowledge on to others had never before veered off course in the history of the world.

If this had been a game of monopoly, OldmanLever would have held boardwalk and parkplace, with hotels stacked to the moon. If this had been a game of risk, OldmanLever would have me cornered in Australia with no means of cashing in for reinforcements. And if this had been a pokemon battle, Dennis would have a Mewtwo with its foot raised, ready to bring it crashing down to crush the skull of my Magikarp into a bloody seafood pulp. The smoky hand of defeat was wrapped around my neck, ready to squeeze the last breath from my lungs. 

Then the skies opened up, and a beam of light dancing elegantly from the clouds, came through my window and sliced the smoky hand of defeat off at the wrist. Epiphany struck, and suddenly the world made sense again. There was no way in hell that the mentor of all those who want to bring positive change to the world through information technology had been wrong on such a vital topic such as this. Unless…

I have not had the benefit of Chris’s instruction since last semester. Up until recently nothing had seemed out of the ordinary, but then I started to notice small changes in him. His sense of style changed, and he started patrolling the halls in suits, which I must admit made him look as though he could take on the world from a corporate office. This all seemed very normal, then all of a sudden meteors started falling from the sky, hell froze over, gravity reversed itself, and Chris Mogensen decided to embrace a Mac with open arms.  Then he was batting for the evildoers on something as fundamental as the cape vs. tail debate? This can’t be the Chris I know and love, it must be some sort of robot imposter. But they havn’t perfected that technology yet….

Oh but they have! Who has perfected the means of turning a organism into a programmable robot AND has a reason to glorify the truly mediocre efforts of Raccoon Mario while encouraging the masses to forget about the triumph that was the cape? None other than well experienced arch-nemesis and longtime Mac user, Doctor Robotnik.

It all makes sense. Robotnik has been the top antagonist in the Sega world for years. Suddenly his rival Sonic jumps boat and starts spending his time brawling with that Nintendo crowd. Rubbing elbows with the likes of Bowser, Wario and Donkey Kong every hour of the day. Robotnik didn’t even get invited to the Brawl, and suddenly he wasn’t the only fat guy in a red suit with an obnoxious moustache in town. Dr. Robotnik was second rate and on his way to the back of Sonics mind, and had already all but disappeared in the minds of gamers everywhere. He needed a way to take the Mario franchise down a few pegs, and he had a plan.

I knew that my Operating Systems mentor had not been lead astray by his own volition. My faith in him had not been misplaced. He had become a pawn in the war of a bitter villain who was willing to scrape the very bottom of moral decay in order to stifle the glory of Mario in an attempt to raise his own standing in the videogame world. This entire thing had gone far deeper than I had feared, and had even found its way into the lifeblood of the very establishment I had once trusted to fill my head with facts. And who was Robotniks first in command? None other than OldManLever himself.

Robotnik hopes to achieve the impossible, that is have the common man abandon all logic and embrace tailed Mario as the highlight of Mario’s career. Then all future generations of gamers will turn away in disgust from the lame tail, which everyone tells them is the best that Mario has to offer. Then where will these disgusted gamers turn? Into the open arms of good old Sonic, where Dr. Robotnik once again gets to sit in his hard earned spotlight. I won’t let that happen.

Where I once thought Lever was furthering a furry agenda, I was sadly mistaken. He was merely using that furry front as a means to hide his deeper darker secrets. And even I, the shining light of truth in this terrible storm of corruption, almost let it slip by me. But I have succeeded in one regard, in keeping the common citizen well informed of what is happening.

Not only have I uncovered his plans and shared them with you, my fellow truth fighters, but I have confronted Lever with my findings and in a slip of mind, he corrected my nomenclature and indirectly confirmed that he is constructing a cybo… err… android army with Dr. Robotnik.

 All hope is not lost, as the public has opened their eyes to his evil ways. As shown in the following quotes. One is even by an individual who aided him in finding a comic to use against me in a previous blog. His eyes have been opened now, and never again shall he fall victim to OldmanLevers spell. Both are valued classmates, and I respect very deeply their sense of right in these dark dark times.

“I used to think 4chan was the bottom of the internet. Then lever started a blog...”
-- Scott Harvey“

"I suppose, (Gaming Zen) is only for beginners, or else for those resolute dead-enders who have made up their minds to be content with the blog of Lever, with symbols rather than with what they signify, with the elegantly composed sentence in lieu of actual ideas.” -- Anthony Legere

Stay strong my friends. This will all be over soon.